Friday, March 24, 2006

Not living up to my full potential

i dont know why-- but all of a sudden i've become disheartened about being a stay-at-home-mommy. i'm not really sure where the feeling came from. just kinda popped up.

[this isnt meant to be boastful--->] when i was in highschool, i was in all honors/Advanced Placement classes. i graduated with a 4.2 (w/ AP classes you got like a .5 boost or something]. The kids i had class with were gonna go to college to do great things: doctors, lawyers, politicians, biochemists, on and on.

And here i am, just a "homemaker."

I wonder: "what do people think of me?" i assume that most people think one of two things about stay-at-home moms: 1) they arent living up to their potential; 2) they're too dumb or lazy to get a good job.

i dont want people to think i'm dumb. i'm actually very smart [again, i dont mean to be boastful]. but i'm also afraid that people look down on me, thinking "oh she's just a housewife." like its a triffle little insignificant thing.

such good timing that i recently just heard a speaker say: Others may think that your life situation is insignificant... But you've been placed where you belong and therefore it is significant.

hmff...

11 comments:

Michaela said...

I think you are Misinformed about what people think about Stay at Home Moms. I think they are great they are doing something not a lot of people can do. You personally play a VERY significant roll in Erica’s life where if you were working a Daycare teacher would have that roll. She gets to spend time with you one of the most important people in her life. You are living up to the potential of raising a child which is hard in this time to many people are on the go to really spend time with their kids and raise them and teach them they leave it up to everyone else in the Childs life.

Linds said...

I completely hear where you're coming from in that I'm facing the same thing with my present job. I don't feel like I'm living up to my potential either. But then I am reminded that what we perceive as potential and what God perceieves as potential are two different things.
He has me at my job not to climb the ladder but to make a difference in the lives of my coworkers for the sake of the kingdom. For you, He has given you a child's life to mold and bring up to honor Him (a very scary and daunting challenge!).
I have to remind myself over and over again that what others perceive of me and how God perceives me at times are completely two different things. And I have to focus on what God's view is rather than those around me as He is the One I'm ultimately pleasing.
There are days I miss writing and researching and expanding my knowlege. But that knowledge is only useful if I impart it to others. Right now, I'm getting the 'hands on' learning of relating and witnessing to people.

Hang in there Becky. One day your children will call you 'blessed' for your committment to spend your time with them. And you never know when God will allow you to 'live up to that potential' down the road. love you!

Abigail S. said...

Pish posh! Being a mommy is a great job! All those "holier than thou" people really secretly wish they could have what you have!

... I know I do! I wanna man and a baby!

Clairissa said...

First off, I love Abby's "pish posh." It amuses me at 12:30 AM!

And secondly, who the heck cares what people think? I, like you, always got good grades, am very intelligent, etc., but heck at least you finished college. Unlike I, who quit to get married! ha ha

Don't concern yourself with what others think of you. And if there were more stay-at-home mothers I think the world wouldn't be as messed up as it is. You (and I) are doing good things for our kids!! :)

P.S. Did you get the invitation in the mail for egg hunt?

'liya said...

My mom was a stay at home mom for my entire childhood and for that I am SO grateful. She was always there to talk to, drive me to swimming, gymnastics, arts cl, the mall, friends, wherever and whenever and most of the time friends wanted to come to MY house cause I had the cool mom, I always had home cooked meals, my mom came on school trips, she was really involved in school and my life and now I'm so close to her. I know a lot of people don't have the opportunity to stay home because of financial reasons or whatever but it's so worth it. She just started going back to work 2 years ago, my sisters and I are all old enough and my brother is too independent anyway she said after 20 years at home she's sick of us :D I wouldn't have had it any other way, and when I have kids one day, as much as I really want to work, I would so rather give them what my mom gave me. Trust me, you're doing the right thing.

Becky L said...

thanks for the encouragement everyone... it really helps

Crazy Me said...

I think stay at home moms are the best. I admire anyone that can do it. I know that I never could because I don't have the patience. Good for you!

Akanksha said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Akanksha said...

my mom is a stay at home mom.. and i respect her soooo much..
what i would like to say is that if u want to work u just go ahead and do that but do it bcoz u want to d it and not bcoz its like a cool thing to do.. dnt even think abt what people say or think.. coz if u were workin they would say that u r ignoring ur child and family ..

So do what u want to do..Be what u want to b

and hey i thought u r a budding writer.. so write a book.. and mayb u could rake in millions..

Tickneen said...

Duuuude, I think being a stay at home parent is much more difficult job than a job outside the home. Even with just 1 child, its a big job. I also think its important for you to be happy. Perhaps something part time would help woo those blues away. Remeber to take care of you.

Anonymous said...

I stumbled upon your blog tonight and it must have been meant to be. I was just in a coma in the shower thinking about how I sometimes feel invisible now that I am a stay at home mom. My background is much like yours and I have a high school reunion coming up and wonder what it so special about staying home. Heck - even my husband seems to wonder what I do all day (despite the fact that I have 3 kids - 6,4 and 2 and am a single mom Monday - Friday since my hubby lives 2 hours away for work). ARGHHH - I know what I do matters but sometimes I feel like my Masters Degree is a total waste and that I really messed up by stepping out of the working world. Then I take a peak at my beautiful babies sleeping and realize this is exactly where I am meant to be.